Fun fact. I’m a little bit gay. I know. It’s hard to tell. I’ve been keeping it a secret. Rarely ever comes up. But it’s true. I’m a queer.

You know where else there are queers? On the online games website itch.io. Itch has a bunch of video games, but they also have a pretty healthy TTRPG scene (I’m assuming by this point in my newsletter writing career y’all know what TTRPG stands for. If not uhhhh… google is your friend?).

The other day, our regularly scheduled Draw Steel session was canceled, so I was looking for games we could do a one shot with. And itch is such a damn treasure trove. I saw a game that actually shattered how I thought about TTRPGs.

Kobolds ate my baby

But first, just a funny one, not necessarily a gay one. Y’all remember how a couple weeks back we played Goblin Quest? (see prev ish: We played Goblin Quest!) Well, I found another TTRPG in a vaguely similar vain:

This game is honestly very similar in vibes, except you’re playing kobolds! Such a comedy RPG. Look at the four stats!!!

Not only is this game failing the Foot Fetish and/or Gooner accusations, it’s also tip toeing into furry accusations.

Hilarious. Iconic. Such a fun time. The magic casting system is literally writing a spell on a piece of paper and then throwing it at whoever you’re casting the spell on. Simply hilarious. I’d love to play it at some point.

Conflict of Interest

Now, we’re moving into the gay little freaks part of this with

ITS A GAME ABOUT SPYYYYYSSSSS IN LOVE (they’re forever). Specifically gay spies (sorry, to the three straights here). You’re in love, but only for brief moments. Nights that are too short, stolen away from your mission. It’s crazy vibes.

It’s such a concise mechanical grounding to create a story. Games like this are always so impressive to me because they’re… distilled. They create enough of a scaffolding then… trust the players to bring the rest.

Reading through this game, I recognized the design of the playbooks. Then, I saw something in the credits. Something I recognized.

As soon as I read “Powered By My Girlfriend” I’ll admit I knew exactly what was coming next. We’re firmly into gay lil freak territory because we’re going to:

the girlfriend of my girlfriend is my friend

Dare I say? An absolute icon of gay lil itch ttrpgs. This was I think maybe the first lil gay ttrpg I came across. I vibe with the name so hard. And the game itself is like actually so evocative. Look at this playbook!

Like I know hahahah graphic design is my passion 💖 . But like… I think this design is actually so evocative? Like it gives the vibe kinda perfectly? And it says like… don’t take the game part of this too seriously? It’s just a vibe. An inspiration.

And it’s SOOOOOOOO evocative. It looks so fun. I’m going to force people to play these gay lil games at some point and it’s gonna be great.

A brief aside

This actually isn’t a game. Well, I think it is, but I don’t know. I may have simply hallucinated a game. Or, perhaps more likely, I’m remembering a misinterpreted version of:

The game I remember was played with three people, where two people played sapphics and one person played some third person. And you basically played out a scene until someone’s character was like “I don’t think I should be here.” And then the sapphics broke up, and you rotated and someone else was the third while one of the sapphics stays in the spotlight while the person who was the third before creates a new sapphic.

This is not that game, but what it is is rad. You play a queer who is, to put it lightly, crashing out about a breakup. And you play through three parties (rotating who plays what part of the party each time), and each party ends when you think about your ex.

There’s also a rad safety tool to indicate I feel called out but please continue.

I FOUND IT

Maybe I requested all my data from itch.io and scrolled through every game I’ve ever so much as seen in the search menu. And I found it. After realizing I didn’t find the game on itch. I realized I needed to go to people’s personal websites. And I found her. Here she is:

I said this was the gay little freaks issue. It’s suuuuchhhhh an evocative game (like all of these).

There are two types of scenes you can play out with your lovers. Hooking Up and Moving In. And there’s this system where together the lovers list four things they need from the place, but the Third removes one of them. So no place is ever perfect. And the way the scenes go right up until you hit a conflict and go “I shouldn’t be here.” Impeccable. The way you’d end up making a complex web of relationships and breakups. It’s just… aaarrrrrgggghhhhhh

I’d love to play it some time. It’s wild because like… I’ve never really had a casual relationship or dated or even had anything other than a very good breakup. (My ex boyfriend and I literally played DnD like five hours after we broke up. It was so chill lmao.) Nor have I really had a desire to do any of those things. So it doesn’t seem like these games would hit for me? But these games just kinda slap in my mind. There’s just a simplicity that goes hard.

If you’re psychoanalyzing me about this you have to tell me your results, that’s the rule. You can’t just psychoanalyze and stay silent.

Are My Wings Even?

This is the game that sort of inspired this. This game truly changed how I think of TTRPGs. Now, imagine a TTRPG. Quintessential TTRPG? Basement. Table. Tax form describing the math of what your character can do. Weirdly shaped dice to determine if you can do a thing. Basically, D&D.

But that’s not TTRPGs. There have been a bunch of games that push the mechanics of the game to reflect the tone and feelings of the characters you portray. In Dread, you remove blocks from a Jenga tower to do things because that reflects the tension of the characters in a horror game. In Ten Candles, you have ten actual candles that are your only light because this is a dark world with one truth above all: you are going to die. And at each stage of the game, you extinguish a candle, bringing you closer and closer into the darkness until it consumes you.

These games don’t use dice, but their mechanics still reduce the separation between character and player emotions. And this same concept is expertly pushed to the max in:

In Are My Wings Even, each player is a young fae who is still figuring themself out. And all of you are preparing for a Revel. Your identities are still in flux, but your friends will help you choose one that’s… close enough, at least for tonight.

And the design for this game is like… off the charts wild. Actually blew my mind. Rewrote how I thought about TTRPGs. Like… these are literally all of the rules for the game

There’s no dice. No character sheet. The mechanics for exploring the attraction of a young fae is… staring at your friends and touching them (PLATONICALLY). Because you’re literally all choosing outfits for each other and putting makeup on each other.

This is literally one of the four stages of the game:

Literally, as actual factual you the person is getting changed in front of your friends the game suggests that “this can be a moment to explore attraction, and not getting caught staring.” Like…. OH MY GOD. What incredible design. Just… oh my god. It feels like it transcends game. It becomes something else. Performance art? Interactive theatre? Like actual player emotions — discomfort, attraction, excitement — are all like… game mechanics? That are used to reinforce the theme of the game. Crazy stuff.

Actually mind blowing. I’m rethinking about what a game is and how it can be made.

Once again, I’d loooooove to play this game but I have not even a concept of a plan for the logistics, who I’d play it with, etc. I am in fact the audience for games for gay lil freaks. :D

Other News

Co-op Update

Simply bored out of my mind. They’ve been blundering the on-boarding process all week so I haven’t actually done anything meaningful. Which may be a good thing because. Well. I hate to admit it but. I’m on the AI Team. I know. Gen AI hater Quyen (I have a drafted newsletter ranting about the social/environmental impacts of gen ai and how it’s like… bad?). I crashed out so hard when I found out.

A new segment: Quyen tries to touch grass

I’m trying to like… do exercise more because it’s like… good for you? And good for your mood. And energy levels. I figured I might drop things here for y’all. It’s not like I’ve got a Strava following or whatever.

Also this technically gets you information that’s close-ish to my house so like… please don’t be weird y’all.

Here’s what I’ve done this past week:

Monday (Biking)

The boyfriend and I biked around Stanley park. We also biked to my place of co-op employment for a bit. Which was fun. Stanley park was good too, but we missed our turn off the seawall (I wanted to go on the trails for a bit), but it worked out. Plus, my bike’s derailer started to be mean so the last 15-20% of the ride sucked for me.

Wednesday (Running)

Time: 19:13
Distance: 1.99 miles
Pace: 9:39 mile
[no photo because that’d definitely dox us]

I’m actually really happy with this run because I went ten minutes out and then 9:13 back, so a negative split! Even with the very mean and steep hill between our home and the beach. I’m really very happy with that.

Friday (Running)

Time: 19:27
Distance: 2.10 miles
Pace: 9:15 mile
[again not doxxing us]

This time I ran along the beach! Which is always pretty. It’s so weird because like… I know I absolutely peaked in high school? And I’ll almost certainly never be that good again. I was definitely in the 99th percentile of runners. Like… I hit a 5:20 mile! An 18:20 5k. That’s like… really good. And I’m never going to train for like 15-20 hours a week again.

Saturday (Biking)

I went to the ol’ work again. Honestly downtown is so scary y’all. There’s so many cars. Cars are scary. No me gusta carros. Also someone at our place decided to lock their bike DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF WHERE I LOCK MY BIKE and this is the first time they’ve done it and they literally did it in the 45 minutes I was gone. So I had to acrobatics my bike into position to lock it to the janky rusty chain (I know, not that safe but like… y’all don’t want my bike, trust). I crashed out so hard.

That’s All!

Things are great. We recorded some podcasts (maybe I said a word that is maybe going to get bleeped?). We got paid by the co-op for the first time. We read a lot of really rad ttrpgs.

OH ALSO. I think my 2.5 year long pathfinder campaign is wrapping up in like 3 sessions. It’s crazy. Literally this game started before either of my current romantic relationships. I’ve loved her so much, but it’s time to set her free. Sure to be a wild finale :D. I’m so excited. We’ve had such banger ttrpg sessions recently.

Until Wednesday at 10:03 pm, buzz on, my busy bees!

My little Nitro kitten since 2025