I joke post AMS Council and get character info from Sam Low

Honestly most of my joke posts weren't very good jokes, and you nerds won't get them unless you were at council which... given this newsletter's demographics, you probably were.

I made a BlueSky to joke post tonight’s AMS Council Session. Also, a recap of my most recent Draw Steel session, and a solicitation for some important information for Sam Low.

Main Story

As we did in Two for the Price of One!, we are once again doing recaps of my TTRPG campaigns because apparently I don’t do them unless they also get published on the Twice-Weekly Daily Nightly Buzz.

Click here to see the full wiki for this campaign (I’ll get through the back log one day Harry, I promise).

Darken the Skies - Session 06

Following a brutal battle against the Foverhome Gnoll Bandits, The Party returns to Foverhome to tend to their wounds. After a couple days' rest, they set off once again towards Rhovea, where a number of the Mossy Brook Refugees plan to settle down.

After a couple days on the road, the party finds a statue in the middle of the road, frozen in the midst of a combative pose. Seeing this, the party split their time between ensuring that the Mossy Brook Refugees were safe and investigating the statue and surrounding area for signs of the creatures who petrified that poor polder. Eventually, the party found then den of the mating basilisks and dispatched them, using a salve extracted from the basilisk corpses to depetrify the two halflings they had found.

Regaining their autonomy, the polders introduced themselves as Eeriyan and Rheena -- former denizens of Rhovea. Eeriyan had been a merchant, traveling between the town and Apogee. However, upon one return, he was met with suspicion and hostility in Rhovea. The townspeople had... changed, somehow. With difficulty, he was able to convince Rheena to leave town. Having done so, her mind returned to normal: something had been influencing it while she was in Rhovea.

The party and the Mossy Brook Refugees feasted and rested with Eeriyan and Rhovea before they parted ways. Several more days passed before The Party (scouting ahead of the Mossy Brook Refugees) arrived in Rhovea, a smallish town with a dozen or so homes.

Zelikaz went to the healer's cabin where he met Faerin, who was clearly tired and not entirely present. Faerin didn't recognize Lady Hemlock of the Autumn Court, who had previously aided Rhovea.

Hemlock then proceeded to meet Suraelyn, an elf who lived on the edge of town. She told Hemlock that a strange influence called a Mind Weave had taken Rhovea which she could only partly resist in thanks to her fae ancestry. This Mind Weave -- a connected network of minds -- started two weeks ago and was a form of mass mind control. For what purpose, Suraelyn did not know.

Mhôrro met with Roisaenan, a high elf guard from Apogee, who had come to Rhovea to provide much needed protection. Meanwhile, Sybil Terique, undetected by any in the town, investigated the homes, finding unmoving townspeople with vacant eyes. She also investigated a house that she had no recollection of.

As the sun began to set, the party joined the town for dinner -- though intentionally avoided eating any of the food. After dinner, the party was requested to leave for a townspeople-only meeting was about to occur. Mhôrro and Hemlock left while Sybil Terique hid in the roof and Zelikaz disguised himself and stayed with the townspeople.

Believing the party to have mostly left, Roisaenan began conducting the Mind Weave ritual. Weak-willed as he is, Zelikaz was immediately folded into the Mind Weave as the townspeople moved in a rhythmic, flower-like pattern as their minds joined in planning an assault of some kind on Apogee and its queen.

Sybil Terique returned to the rest of the party and -- noticing that Zelikaz hadn't been returned -- begrudgingly searched the town for him. In doing so, they came across the home of Roisaenan, which Sybil Terique and forgotten on her previous search. Within, were soot crows and a ceramic horse, both of which are commonly found in Apogee.

Some time into the ritual, Roisaenan noticed the presence of Zelikaz (and that of the audience: Hello Twice-Weekly Daily Nightly Buzz readers!). She apologized to the fine folks of the audience and the archfae producer of this production for taking their fine troubadour away, but promised he'd be returned unharmed. At which point, Zelikaz was folded back into the Mind Weave ritual to contribute to her schemes.

Unable to find Zelikaz, the remainder of the party returned to the ritual. Upon their confrontation, Roisaenan unhappily agreed to undergo the load redistribution process to release Zelikaz from the Mind Weave on the condition that the party leave her be. She'd be out of Rhovea by the morning. The party tentatively agreed. With Zelikaz released, he sputtered out some of what he had experienced in the Mind Weave, allowing the rest of the party to piece together Roisaenan's plan to assassinate the queen, thus sending Apogee back to the original home of the elves: Aisir Aiwenor.

Upon learning this (and at the direction of Sybil Terique), the party moved to attack Roisaenan and interrupt the ritual.

Other News

Elena, I just want you to know that your gif was the most clicked link in the previous issue of the Twice-Weekly Daily Nightly Buzz. Icon behaviour :).

Oops Aisha isn’t fully leaving

She’s gonna be the Editor-in-Chief of The Ubyssey, but still. Not at council as often :(. Anyways, she’s gonna slay. And not that she needs a bee to white knight for her, but I am gonna fistfight r/ubc whenever they say mean things.

(Also Aisha, would you be willing to sign my candidate profile that I cut out of The Ubyssey and stuck up on my wall? 🥺👉👈 I want it to match my signed stickers from Riley and /u/sasamats and my signed business card from Drédyn and my “Vote for Nobody” shirt from Nobody)

Oh thank god

The Ubyssey’s Year-in-Review issue is out and — best I can tell — it didn’t include the words “Most kissable organization.” Which honestly I’m very thankful for. Just logistically, it would have been a little tough to kiss every Ubyssey person who wanted to. Like… is it all Ubyssey people (Ubyssey forever?), or just current people? Is it any contributor? Or just staff? Or just editors??? What about the business team and web development team, do they deserve the opportunity for kisses??????? These are all questions I thankfully do not need to answer.

I will say, though, not having a section for since lines in the Year-in-Review absolutely robbed us of the chance to see “my girlfriend said she’d fuck your mom since 1918” in print again. Which is a travesty for all of us. A+ since line with A+ context.

I guess I’m joke tweeting council meetings…

We had an AMS Council meeting this evening, which at the behest of [REDACTED], I joke posted on BlueSky. I made a parody icon and banner based on the UbysseyHumour X.com (the everything Nazi app) account that I’m very proud of (they’re so fucking bad lmaoooo)

Busted out the online MS Paint for this to make sure it couldn’t be too good lmao. Honestly I’m surprised that The Ubyssey’s U is so recognizable

What can I say, graphic design is my passion

Here’s a subset of our posts tonight. I honestly had an incredible time joke posting to 0 followers. Made the meeting way more bearable.

WAIT THEYRE TALKING ABOUT THE David Suzuki First Year David Suzuki Pit Night for Sustainability for Sustainability. Jake would be so happy, but he's busy running as an actual MP for the Liberal party.

Humour At Home (@ubussy.ca)2025-04-10T01:23:03.361Z

This is actually not a joke: https://jakesawatzky.liberal.ca

Walking through the entire 14 page Code Change PDF during council is giving "prof realizes none of the students did the reading"

Humour At Home (@ubussy.ca)2025-04-10T01:51:03.096Z

Governor Lorien objects to the use of a hyphen in "by-laws". This is the level of detailed analysis we need from our elected representatives.

Humour At Home (@ubussy.ca)2025-04-10T02:03:52.156Z

Wait y’all Sam Low likes my code…

WE DONT HAVE TO PUT ME ON BLAST FOR NOT HAVING TESTS 😭😭😭

Also Sam et al., here’s the pitch for tomorrow’s session:

Oosten lies not far from the southern coast of the Federation of Trali. Passers-by recall the vibrant sunsets and mouth watering fruits among the town’s vibrant foliage. Or so they did.

In recent weeks, no word has been heard from Oosten. Letters ignored and their carrier lost to the wind. A band of concerned families ventured out to Oosten, but didn’t return. Further still, the guard sent a small troop of people-at-arms, lost to the town as well.

It is clear that something is amiss with Oosten – something more dangerous than any normal person is prepared for.

Legends say that the Deity of Night and Death — wounded in battle — lied along Trali’s coast to regain themself, allowing their divine blood to seep into the ground. For millennia, the blood has pooled within the world undisturbed… but with the aid of a hundred tiny soldiers, the wicked and vile may have a plan for it yet.

SAM LOW: Character Info

Hey Sam, before our game tomorrow, I need some information about what type of character you’ll be wanting to play. You can respond in a manner of your choice (Mastodon, GitHub commit, email, post on your blog).

Full Pregen or Some Choice?

Firstly, do you want me to handle all the choices and make a full character for you, or would you prefer to make some basic choices (ancestry and class)?

If you just want me to handle everything, you can ignore the rest of this section :D.

Ancestry

Basically, what kind of cool fantasy creature are you? I’ve given some light elaboration on the less intuitive ones. Choose one among the following:

  • Devil.

  • Dragon Knight. You’re a dragon person.

  • Dwarf.

  • Wode Elf. Naturey elf with an innate glamour that helps them stay hidden.

  • High Elf. Artsy elf with an innate glamour that makes them seem more attractive.

  • Hakaan. Big stone person who experiences visions of their death

  • Human. Presumably like you, Sam

  • Orc. 

  • Polder. Short humanoid with ability to merge into shadow. Copyright-conscious hobbit.

  • Revenant. An undead with unfinished business. If you choose revenant, also decide what ancestry you were before your death.

Class

This is what kinda of cool shit you can do! Ones marked with an asterisk are a little more complicated, but honestly not by much. You’d definitely still be able to figure them out. Choose one among the following, then follow the additional instructions. My suggestion is to basically just choose which ever one of the bolded words sounds coolest. (also if you want a recommendation, Black Ash Shadow really fucks)

  • Censor: A censor is a trained warrior devoted to a saint or god. They hunt down forces of evil using melee weapons and magic granted to them by their divine patron and specialize in locking down one enemy during combat and hunting the wicked.

    • Choose which Order sounds the coolest: Exorcist, Oracle, Paragon

  • Conduit: A conduit is the devoted priest of a saint or god. They wield divine magic that smites enemies with holy energy and supports their allies. They are the best healing class in this book.

    • Choose two of the following for what domains your deity represents: Creation, Death, Fate, Knowledge, Life, Love, Nature, Protection, Storm, Sun, Trickery, War 

  • Elementalist: An elementalist studies the elemental forces of the timescape and controls earth, fire, the void, and more with magic. Many of their abilities cover wide areas of the map and they have a versatile array of tricks that allow them to control the battlefield and accomplish tasks outside of combat.

    • Choose one of the following as your elemental specialty: Earth, Fire, Green, Void

  • Fury: Coursing with the rage of the Primordial Chaos in their veins, a fury is a mobile warrior who gets up close and personal with enemies to dish out lots of damage. If you want to leap around the battlefield felling your foes and breaking down walls, then the fury is the class for you.

    • Choose one of the following styles: Hit Shit Hard, Guerrilla Warfare, Turn Into a Mother Fucking Animal.

    • If you chose “Turn Into a Mother Fucking Animal,” choose an mother fucking animal you turn into: bear, wolf, rat, raven

  • Null: Disciplined and calm, the null is an unarmed warrior who creates an aura that quells the supernatural and other special effects created by their enemies. They use psionics to make their body stronger than any steel and faster than any steed.

    • Choose your kinesis: chronokinesis (time powers), cryokinesis (ice powers), metakinesis (gravity powers)

  • Shadow: Stalking foes from the darkness, the shadow is an expert assassin and thief who can use melee and ranged attacks to great effect if they get the drop on their foe. They also utilize magic to help them stay mobile on the battlefield and sneak up on their prey.

    • Choose which assassin technique you follow: College of Black Ash (teleporting all over the place), College of Caustic Alchemy (poisons), College of the Harlequin Mask (illusory magic)

  • Tactician: A brilliant strategist and weapons master, the tactician excels at granting allies more movement and actions in the battlefield and supports their allies outside of combat as well. If you want to inspire your friends to greatness, then the tactician class is for you.

    • Choose your battle strategy: Insurgent(Asymmetric Warfare), Mastermind (Grand Strategy), Vanguard (Shock and Awe)

  • Talent*: A talent is the master of psionics, manifesting powers that manipulate objects, minds, and time. These heroes can reach far into themselves to use abilities even when they don’t have enough heroic resources—if they’re willing to face the cost.

    • Choose your pathy: chronopathy, telepathy, telekinesis

  • Troubadour*: A troubadour inspires their allies with storytelling and swordplay that is as much an art as it is an act of war. Their quips, songs, poems, and epic tales produce actual magic that harms foes and bolsters allies. They can even use their magic to tweak the campaign’s story in real time to better suit their needs.

    • Choose your performance: swordplay, music, stories

From the Web

  • Where We Draw the Line (The Ubyssey). An article about ethics in UBC’s computer science department from a couple years ago that is super insightful. I’m in CPSC 310 right now, and the ethics module kind of scared me. It was actually just like “should you exploit a loophole in your privacy policy that allows you to sell a bunch of identifiable geolocation data to government/advertisment agencies? It’s betraying your customer’s trust and privacy, but it’ll make your company a whole boat load of money!” (basically all the ethics questions ended in “but it’ll make your company a whole boat load of money!”). The class’s responses did not instil me with confidence.

  • UBC's Climate Action Plan 2030 progress to date (The Ubyssey). Very happy with our 2% CO2 emissions reduction 💪💪💪. This is a very in-depth article that also gives you basically all the context you need to understand the Climate Action Plan and how UBC is doing. You should actually click the link and read the article.

  • Four UBC faculty members and graduate student initiate litigation to compel university to ‘refrain from political activity’ (The Ubyssey). Surprising no one, Spencer and Aisha cook again. Me when I don’t like being reminded that Canada did the whole “finders keepers losers weepers” thing to get 95% of British Columbia’s land so I take it up with the BC Supreme Court.

  • One Year Later (Game Changer on Dropout). Holy shit y’all. The first episode of Game Changer Season 7 is out. It’s over an hour long and it’s an absolute banger. Jacob Wysocki, Vic Michaelis, and Lou Wilson are given a year to complete 15 assignments. It’s absolutely unhinged. A musical happens? Something gets sent to Antartica? There’s a kink therapist?!?!?! The amount of bits that get committed to… y’all, you’ve got to watch this episode. It’s very much worth getting Dropout for this (or asking me for my password :D)

From the Archive

Breaking for tradition, I am not including Ubyssey material but instead I present the three notes at the start of the 1942 issue of The Tillicum (The AMS Student Handbook).

Also, this is how I learn that The Ubyssey sits on a throne of lies. Anon (which became Anonymous (which became The Ubicee (which finally became The Ubyssey))) was actually founded in 1916, not 1918. In 1917 the AMS added a fee to increase The Ubicee’s budget, and once the paper resumed publishing in 1918, they finally took up the name The Ubyssey.

That’s All!

It’s been a fun couple days. I’m sort of not stressing about exams yet, so I’ve just been doing some pleasure reading and grinding out some Slay the Spire before its successor releases later this year (right now I’m Ascension 15 on all characters. I want to get to A20 before Slay the Spire 2 releases).

I’m sure I’ll get stressed later, but I’ve been very happy to give myself a bit of a break right now.

Until Sunday at 10:03 pm, buzz on, my busy bees!

Ubyssey wannabe since 1918 since 2025

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