You know, I was asked whether or not I was going to publish on weekends, to which my answer was “mmmm probably. An AMS President never sleeps. 18 hours a day, 8 days a week.” So here we are, writing an email to y’all on a Saturday. But I never said they’d be high quality emails, so I’m just going to vamp until I hit about 1000 words.

Just saying words

Ubyssey, you up?

First of all, the polls the other night. Based on those, things are looking preeeetttyyyyyy good for me. Everyone who responded thinks I should ask The Ubyssey out on a date and do some polycule type action with /u/sasamats (my fiancé). I proposed this to her and the response was “sounds gay im in.” So… you know.

Ubyssey. Hi. I saw you from across the Michael Kingsmill Forum and really liked your vibe. I’ve been really scared to ask you out since you’re so cool and intimidating. But all of my best friends on this newsletter have been hyping me up so here goes. I was wondering if you maybe wanted to go out to dinner with me. You and me. In the Gallery. This Friday at 8pm or so? You don’t have to respond if you don’t want to. I’ll go there anyways and wait for you, hoping you’ll decide to meet me there. And… despite all your flirty banter and playful jokes, if you don’t feel the same way about me as I do about you, that’s fine. A shame for me, but I’ll let it go. I won’t bother you all about it again.

Another Section

I’m not even at 300 words, so I’ve got to vamp even more I guess? Just Barry “Bee” Yapping Hour out here. What is there even to say, we’re just going stream of consciousness here so there’s really no thought. Don’t worry, I’m not going to edit it down or proofread it at all. You folks are getting the straight dope.

Uhhhh… I hung up some debate placards on our wall. I got mine, obviously. And I also got my fiancé /u/sasamats’ placard, which they left while being kidnapped on Thursday. I made sure to place theirs with the blue Engagement Ring Pop residue visible, just for the memories. Speaking of, I will be carrying around the engagement ring pop /u/sasamats left until such a time as I am able to give it back.

Also speaking of the ring pop, holy shit Kae??? At the debate, she threw that ring to be from across the David Suzuki Pit for Sustainability with perfect aim. I had a backup Ring Pop in my jacket at the ready because I was sure it would go disastrously, but that was such a damn good throw. And then I went and fucked up opening the package and The Ubyssey cut me off before /u/sasamats could accept (they’re probably jealous cause they think I’m kissable).

Okay, I need to find more things to talk about.

Other News

Chat, I’m still on Reddit someone help me

Except… I’m winning at Reddit this time???? This was a comment under this post, which clipped this Ubyssey article out of context to imply that Lorien and Desjarlais thought that the solution to food security was… extreme couponing?

Anyways, I love the obviously-a-candidate burner accounts on Reddit. I’m sure glad that no actual elected candidates would have those.

Media Coverage

:0. Not to make this newsletter The Nightly Thirst Over The Ubyssey Before I Go To Bed, but they did write some more stuff about me! I am—of course—in their guide to the 2025 candidates.

And dare I say, they had some absolutely glowing remarks about me

I’m glad to hear that my platform is one of the most in-depth. As I said in the second Presidential debate, my website has 4845 words while one of my opponents—who claimed to have the most thorough platform—only has 4271 words on his website. And my number isn’t even counting these newsletters, which each are around 1000 words long. So really all my campaign materials would bring it to like 10000 words! That’s pretty big and robust. Probably means I’d be a really good candidate. Because I have so many themes and so many words.

And hey! You fine folks got mentioned! You’re the student engagement in the form of daily nightly newsletters. I’m not sure you needed both the daily and the nightly there, but you know, I’ll take it. Wait… chat, should I rename this newsletter The Daily Nightly Buzz? That’d be kinda funny…

(I’ll also say, it’s really funky seeing The Ubyssey using he/him pronouns for Barry with my face right there. As the person behind the bee, I’m more of a they/she kind of girlie, so it’s… It’s not uncomfortable or anything, just feels kinda weird. And, to be clear, The Ubyssey asked which pronouns they should use and I said he/him because I thought those were the pronouns Barry used and that it would be funny :D)

PDFs are fucking me

I hate PDFs. I hate adobe. I hate hate hate adobe :/. The PDFs of my campaign posters are being mean to me and Barry’s body is becoming translucent when it is opened in anything except Adobe Acrobat, including the proofs for the printer. And all the homies hate adobe and their dumb file formats. Anyways, that’s just really frustrating. I’m hoping to get it figured out tomorrow so I can have posters printed by Monday night, but we’ll see. I hate PDFs.

And I mean… my PDF hate is also coming from someone who makes PDFs. You folks probably don’t know this about me, but I’ve made PDF products for TTRPGs (along with my boyfriend). And let me tell you. PDFs hate everything and everyone. They’re the worst. Anyways, that’s my rant time.

That’s All

There we go, I’ve delivered my contractually obligated daily nightly email. It’s basically 1000 words. This is the amount of half-assery I’ll bring to the role of AMS President. So make sure to consider that when you Pokémon Go to the Polls (despite everyone whose opinion I value saying I’d be good at it, I really don’t want the job so please please please don’t vote for me).

Anyways, Ubyssey, hit me up about that date :). Friday the 14th. 8pm. The Gallery.

Until tomorrow at 10:03 pm, buzz on, my busy bees!